Broke up with the GF….

[Crim]

I feel numb. I know that I’m actually repressing most of my feelings right now otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to pick myself up and get my ass home.

We has been going out for nearly four months now, we’ve had our share of problems during that time but we’ve always felt like they were something that we could work out. But her losing her feelings for me is one thing that can’t be worked out.

I feel like such a fool too, for letting myself get that close to her. I was feeling like this is the kind of girl that I could spend the rest of my life with; I really fell for her.

I just got back home from her place; it was a pretty hellish day for her and once we had a chance to be alone we sort of started talking about how things were going for us. I knew something was going to happen, today just felt like one of those days so far. Earlier I had meet a new friend of her’s; a guy she meet at work. He was acting weird the whole time so I knew something was going on.

She tells me that she had been talking with him about me and her, that she was starting to feel like she didn’t love me as much anymore and that we didn’t really have a lot in common so she was worried that it was more infatuating then love. The guy then tells her that he likes her. She tells me that she does have some feelings for the guy and she thinks they’re more compatible then me and her.

I tell her that I want to work through any problems that we have cause I really want to be with her. She tells me that she’s not certain that she loves me anymore, that she’s been feeling like that for a while now. I tell her that if thats the case then there isn’t a whole lot we can do.

She tells me that even if she does have feelings for this guy she doesn’t want to get into another relationship so soon, she wants to take it slow and start off as friends with him and see where it goes.

He’s a good guy and I’m sure he’ll treat her well but, right now, I’m crushed.

She is the kind of girl that anyone would find themselves luck to end up with; she’s sweet, caring, warm and very fun to be with. We started out as friends at work and then once we both had quit we something started to develop between us and before I knew it I was starting to fall for her. I know that we’re not totally compatible but I want to change, I wanted to become the kind of person that was more deserving of her. She made me want to become a better person. She made me want to get my “shit” together cause I saw a future for both of us. She did too, at one point.

I’m glad that she was honest with me but she wants to stay friends. Right now, this is going to be very hard for me to do with him around. Hell, even without him in the picture it’s going to be like torture but I want her to be a part of my life still cause she already made me a better person just by being with me (even for a short amount of time but I don’t really know what to do. Even now I’m starting to cry about it.

Thanks for reading, I just really needed to get some of these things out.

Cliff notes:
* GF left me.
* Broke my heart.
* Potentially a new guy in the picture.
* She wants to be friends still.
* THANK GOD for vodka.

[Author]

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